I was asked recently what I feel submission is at its base. I know it’s more than kinky sex, though that sure can be an awesome part of it 😉 It’s not “giving up your life to a Dom”, and although it can entail that for some people, it sure doesn’t for me. So I had to think, what is it? What is submission to me?
One thing that I’m discovering as I progress on this journey into my submissive side, is that there have been some clues through my life pointing out this direction to me. One is, even though I am a fiercely independent woman, I crave touch and attention. I just never knew how to express it before, or maybe more accurately, had been too stubborn to admit it (and still can be a lot of the time). Also, the control freak in me has always ached to give parts of myself over to a trusted one, especially sexually. I get too into my head and self conscious when I’m asked to take control. I’ve learned that giving up control is something that quiets the never ending thoughts inside my brain, or at least helps organize them in a more cohesive fashion.
What I’ve found is submission to me is based in opening yourself up completely to another person, connecting with them on a different, deeper level. Giving them power and trusting them incessantly not to take said power for granted and/or do you any harm. The form and limits that the power exchange can take varies depending on the relationship and what’s been agreed upon between Dominant and submissive.
Those are my 2 cents anyway *shrugs*